P.O.P. Day 121: It Could Be Worse

Yes, it is 93 degrees. But think of this, 4 months ago, you were complaining how frozen you were. Yes, the garden is full of weeds. But you could live in a place where it is dry and nothing grows. Yes, you have a few extra pounds stubbornly hanging on. But you could be in a situation where you do not get enough to eat. Yes, you may be in a cranky mood (I was). But there is always something to smile about. Always. There is always something to look forward to. There is always a reason to be your best self. Even if that reason is just to make someone else appreciate their life and all they have.

Soak up that heat that you may have fond memories of it in the middle of January. get your hands in the dirt and pull out those weeds knowing that flowers and veggies will give you joy. Eat the ice cream cone and be blessed that you can. Smile, someone else may be depending on it.

*Caution-a tiny little curse word at 2:15*



P.O.P. Day 117: Maintaining Momentum

"She acquires momentum as she advances." ~Virgil

It is one thing to get a project started, to make decision, to move forward. It is another thing entirely to maintain that momentum: to complete that project, to act on the decision to keep moving forward. We might settle for doing something just part way or just enough to get by. Why? This is an opportunity to exceed your own expectations (think of it as your personal report card). Don't get yourself short shrift.

As the long weekend looms, I want to maintain that momentum for myself. I have so many opportunities--I can run, I can weed the garden so painstakingly put in, I can boost my curb appeal, I can experiment with my new cool tools in the studio. I am trying to focus on a few things to keep moving:

• Setting greater challenges: so I got the veggies planted, my greater goal will be to get the garden weeded and mulched so they can thrive.
• Review what you've done:  Last night before the rain, I surveyed the kingdom, looked over the planting, wished for seedlings.
• Re-energize: To prepare for the weekend and the renewed enthusiasm, I have washed all my gardening gloves, registered for a running mechanics class, made several design sketches and read a jewelry magazine.
• Remind-why am I doing all this?: I love to eat veggies that are crispy and warm from the garden, I love to put up food so I can have it later in the year, I love the feeling of just being able to run, I like the solitude of a good run, I love to make pieces that are unique and fun.
• Recognize and Reward: I am doing well with my training and I spent a few dollars on a training watch to monitor it. I have planted a beautiful garden and I am going to move my swing to be able to look at it. I have new studio tools and one of the pieces that I make this week will be for myself!

P.O.P. Day 114: Support

Never underestimate the power of good support. It keeps up healthy and it keeps us sane.

 I never realized how blessed that I am until I really needed that support. I have friends who will drive me to doctor's appts. and hold my hand when I am scared. I have friends who appreciate my artwork and push me to work harder. I have friends who nudge me closer to my training goals--working out with me, acknowledging my successes, reminding me to take it slow.

 I also learned that I can support myself, not just financially but emotionally as well.  I can push myself to work harder. I can remind myself of how far that I've come. I can allow myself to cry as well as smile. And I will continue to be there for myself ;)

P.O.P. Day 113: Back in the Saddle

Print by Nicole Dicimo of The Blue Bicicletta

Stand back. Because I am back. So, I don't have a partner and that sucks. So, I have a mystery malady and that sucks (though I think going gluten-free has helped). But, I have my gardens back. I have my zeal to train back. I have my desire to design jewelry back. I have the urge to run back. I have the power to make myself healthier back.

Don't be afraid. Take you back!

P.O.P. Day 110: Slow and steady...

Illustration by artist Peter Fong

By nature, I am an impatient person. Quick results make me happy. But that is not always the best way to get things done.

We all know the story of the tortoise and the hare. Quick may be fun, but it doesn't always win the race. This story is especially appropriate for me right now. Patience is what is required to even run the race. I registered for the Boilermaker in January on the very night that it opened. I had planned on running it with someone special and we planned on preparing together.

But circumstances change in life, and although that individual is still important to me, the relationship has evolved. With this change, my attention to the Boilermaker slipped. As did my training. I had suffered a running injury in December and spent a long time nurturing myself and frankly, being kinda lazy. The race is now a scant 50 days away. I ran a little over 4 miles on Tuesday, mainly to see if I could. Good news...I can, bad news...still injured. I have altered my training plan to do things the smart way. The slow way. Shorter distances to start. More stretching. Foam rolling. Massage. Strength training.

I will run that race. I will recover. I just can't do either tomorrow. As with my entire life, if I want it, I will have to work for it--break it into manageable pieces, rest when necessary, not expect results overnight--but really work. The race and life will be that much sweeter if I do.

P.O.P. Day 109: Have to vs. Get to

Print by photographer Darren Hendley of Retroimages

You know something? We take a lot for granted in our insular little worlds.

I have a chellenge for you. Instead of saying, "I have to make dinner." say "I get to make dinner." Instead of saying, "I have to go to another of my child's concerts." you actually "get to go." We are making our lives a chore. Sometimes things really are, but they don't have to be. Making dinner can be stressful, hurried, and generally a pain. But you GET to make dinner. Some people don't have that opportunity for one reason or another. Maybe they lack funds, equipment, a home, a dining partner, the time. You can take some joy in chosing what to cook, loving using the ingredients, crafting a meal, and enjoying the fruits of your labors.

Use this spring as a chance to transplant some new ideas into your head. I get to run. I get to dig, cultivate, nurture, and grow my own food. I get to make my home a welcoming place. I get to be a better person.

P.O.P. Day 108: Turning Over a New Leaf (or rediscovering a leaf that you've misplaced)

This morning was overcast. I had worn my rain boots to work. Although I am making jewelry and taking back the garden, I didn't feel like that was enough. My recent health issues have left me exhausted and unable to log any gym time. I am feeling lethargic and kinda roly poly. So today, I strapped on the old Brooks running shoes and hit the trail...literally.

I am registered to run The Boilermaker in a scant 52 days. I haven't run a race since Thanksgiving and my training has be sporadic at best since I injured my IT band in December. Regardless of diagnosis and whatever comes with it, I AM running that race. I don't have much time to train, but I am going to push myself to be ready. I probably overdid it today, running 4.28 miles. I will strength train tomorrow, do a short run on Friday and hopefully another long one on Saturday.

Some people meditate. So zen out while walking the dog. I run. And I will be a runner again.

P.O.P. Day 107: Channeling the Fear

Great print by Amy Rupin Fleet of Pinwheel Designs

So lately, I have been pretty overwhelmed with the fear of the unknown. There is something wrong with me and no one knows what it is...yet...

I had a few days when the show was over and I was out of sorts and afraid. I thought that I would be paralyzed by my uneasiness. And for a while, I was. But I decided that I have talked so much about my dreams and goals that maybe some time in the studio was what was needed.

I cleaned. I sketched. I organized. I pondered. Then I picked up the hammer. I began my first new design. I channeled my fear into creating. The weight of the hammer in my hand and the shining newness of the metal on the bench began to take some of that uneasiness away. With every stroke and cut, I remembered that regardless of how I feel or if anyone purchased these new creations, I was fulfilling a goal. I am making the world a more beautiful and positive place. Ideas are coming stronger. Projects are intricate than before. I have ordered new tools to take it to the next level. I have increased my facebook and twitter presence.

 My jewelry has always been uplifting, but I decided to design a new line specifically inspired by this blog.

What posts would like to see transformed into a work of wearable art?

P.O.P. Day 103: The Other Side of the Fence

jenzart telling it like it is!

Or in the immortal words of Mick Jagger, "You can't always get what you want..." As a quasi-newish single girl, I am still struggling with loneliness. A lot of us are. Single people, married people, widows and widowers, people with few friends, people with multitudes of friends.

When I talk to many of my friends, I become envious of their lives--husbands, families, houses, babies, whatever. I don't have any of that. Their response is typically the opposite--they want the freedom and autonomy of my life. One is not better than the other, we just want what we don't have. There are issues that a single person faces that a married one doesn't but it goes both ways. I don't have to worry about someone else's schedule, their mood, or what they might want for dinner.

I am struggling to balance loneliness vs. being alone. Loneliness can drag you down, while solitude allows you to pursue those things that bring you joy.

"Language... has created the word "loneliness" to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word "solitude" to express the glory of being alone.” ~Paul Tillich

When it boils right down to it, it is okay to be lonely as long as you realize that you are not alone in feeling that way. Being alone opens doors that are made for only one person to go through.

P.O.P. Day 102: A stroll down memory lane....

Photo by Joseph Medeiros of Boulevard Concepts

Memories are tricky things. Sometimes we idealize something, remembering it more more fondly than it deserves. But often, memories help to remember how we became the people that we are today.

Yesterday, I was asked to post some old photos on Facebook of shows gone by. Doing so helped me to remember why I love the theatre and why I am the Weas that you all get today.

Thank you to all who helped shape those memories and helped shape me in the process.

Me in Maccers 1990

Me directing Maccers 2011

Same school, same club, better Weas.

P.O.P. Day 101: Get started already...

Print by artist Elise Joy

Once I get going on a project, I typically forge ahead and give it my all. The problem is actually getting started. I have a little problem with that. I have grandiose plans but issues with actually starting a project. So, as any internet savvy gal these days, I googled "ways to get motivated". You know what? Even that step helped me feel a little more motivated towards my goal.

Based on a few sites, here are a few pointers to get and (hopefully) stay motivated. The text in green is my goal and how I will be working towards it.

1. Choose a goal. Just being motivated for motivation's sake is not going to do it!

 I will plant and maintain a variety of gardens this year, including perennial, annual, lettuce, herb, and veggie.

2. Get inspiration. Find things that will make you inspired to fulfill your goal.

I am re-reading Animal, Vegetable, Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver and looking through The Garden Primer.

3. Get excited! Do things that will get you excited about working towards your goal.

I got out all my gardening tools, started some seeds, bought some bulbs, and am working on a garden plan.

4. Declare your goal. Commit publicly to what you want to do. Put it on Facebook, call your friends, write a blog ;)

I will be planting an working in my gardens from now until the harvest. Just because my former spouse and I used to it together doesn't mean that I have to avoid it!

5. Do something daily. Even just thinking about your goal helps you to work towards it. Taking little bites makes things more manageable.

I have declared and researched, I am slowly raking out beds and will soon begin pulling weeds. Seeds have been started and I am going to the plant sale on Saturday.

6. Get support. Everything is easier with a buddy.

Anytime anyone wants to weed or plant with me, I'll supply the gloves and iced tea!

7. Recognize that motivation comes and goes. You can't be all gung ho all the time. Give yourself some slack if you aren't always on the ball.

Somedays, I may just water plants or read about the garden and that's okay.

8. Stick with it. Anything really worth doing is worth the patience and hard work.

I really like homegrown veggies and bouquets, so any work that I do will come back to me.

9. Start small. Don't think that you have to do everything at once. Do small bits day by day.

The garden will need time to grow but will also need time to get ready. A weed here and a rake there will all add up to pesto, tomato sauce, and grilled veggies later this summer!

P.O.P. Day 100: Growth

Another season has come to a close. The curtain has been lowered and the set struck. I am supremely proud of each and every student involved. Thank you.

Each show, though, comes with a little let down. The routine is gone--quick dinners, shared jokes, working through the process, helping each other. I am now granted more time to myself, but that too gets old.  The end of the show reminds me once more that I am coming home to an empty house and that gets old as well.

I am trying to re-focus and re-prioritize. That can be a let down in and of itself. It causes one to re-evaluate and sometimes that can be painful too. Crap. 

Change is good. Growth is good. One thing that I have decided is that I am going to put energy back into working outdoors and growing things.

Print by artist Dale Coyhendall of LizzyClara

One word can sum up gardening and reconciling oneself with your lot in life: beets. My former spouse did not enjoy beets. I do. I am growing my own beets and will enjoy them. I will not be growing hot peppers.

That past life was at times wonderful and loving and sometimes not. Same with this new life.

A season has just passed, but a new season is just beginning. The last season was indoors, usually dark, sometimes stressful but with a wonderful outcome. This new season will be outdoors, sunny, and also sometimes stressful but with a wonderful outcome. I am in a funk, but hope that a little sunshine, a dash of fresh air, a sprinkling of dirt and some anticipated growth (in many ways) will snap me back into shape! plus, all that time in the garden will give me the chance to decide next season shows ;)

P.O.P. Day 93: The Show Must Go On

Print by KK Smith of the Gold Egg

Okay, kids, take that ball and run with it. Show them all what you've got. Even if you don't think that you have anything more to give, I know that you do.